Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
