It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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