Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Randomize
