We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
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