I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
