yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
