yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
Randomize
