4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
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