im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Randomize