but the lizard people decide everything anyway
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
