I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Randomize
