You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
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