i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize