Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
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Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
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Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
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