Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
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IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
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Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
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