How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Please, let me fuck your mom
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
