Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize