Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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