just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Randomize
