Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Randomize
