they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
Randomize
