This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
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