i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
