ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
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