Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
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