So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
