If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
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