turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
how does that bad decision feel?
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
