whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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