Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I cannot find my penis.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
Randomize
