are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
