Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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