very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
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