we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Randomize
