Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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