thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
