Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
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