He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Randomize
