Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
