you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
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