If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
I love having hate sex.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
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