it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
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