peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
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