i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
