How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
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i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
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