I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
