Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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