Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Randomize
