their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I got her a Nickelback box set.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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