Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Randomize
